Wednesday, September 21, 2005

This is so like totally the title

The American girls in my Economics class have like totally such an extensive like vocabulary. They are like totally saying like ‘totally’ and ‘like’ and ‘you know’ like every ten seconds you know. It’s like, totally retarded. I mean like get like an education you know what I mean? Hellooooo, saying like all those words I like, you know, just mentioned is like sooo totally not intelligent at all you know. It’s just like: grow up you know what I mean?!

Americans are like totally a hoot, you know what I mean?

Sigh.

I did make a friend in that class. Yes, I made my very first real friend in college. I mean like, I already had friends there. But it’s like you know, this is the first friend I made there. It’s so totally like cool.

I’m going to stop trying to impersonate an American.

Anyhoo, her name is like Anna, but we call her Anna Banana. Just like because it’s fun. She doesn’t like totally look like a banana or something, you know?. It just like totally rhymes. She’s like from Mexico and llike totally used to live near the US border. Anna like totally really likes us. It’s like because we’re totally hot and funny and all that.

She is like totally our twin sister. I mean like she doesn’t read the material you know and she like doesn’t know what the hell is like going in that class. It’s pretty much totally like meant to be, you know what I mean?

My karma is like totally skyrocketing today. I like totally let other people enter the bus like before me and I like let someone else sit in my spot. It’s like I’m doing something for society you know? Like something other than like giving free head at parties.

And people like say I’m dumb and like totally just think about like myself.

They are like so totally clueless. It's like you know what they say: never judge a cover by its book or something? That like totally is appropriate for like my situation you know?

Oh my gaw. It’s like totally 2:30pm. I like have to eat and like throw up. I don't want to get like fat or something. You know?

Like, wish me luck!

Kisses.


PS: It is annoying, isn’t it? If I catch someone using the words ‘like’, ‘totally’ and ‘you know (what I mean)’ in such a way as like totally portrayed above, I am totally like you know, having their asses deported. Or you know like, having their beady little eyes pierced with my BIC pen. And believe me, I could like so totally do that. Like both. Yeah, I could so totally do both.

9 comments:

Jenna said...

I like totally cannot believe those American idiots were like totally saying like all the time!

I have to break my kid of saying you know after every sentence you know? It's like she needs an a positive affirmation from her listener after after fucking sentence you know?

The Snakehead said...

You are such a fag.

Billy the Bootlegger said...

Jenna - I know right? Like, it was like totally surprise to me too that like you know, American girls like talk that way. Where did this come from anyway?

Good luck with the kid :)

Snakey - Takes one to know one. And: duh.

Kirsti said...

Like totally I know what you mean. Like DUH! Totally!

Paws said...

Economics?

Wankeromics..

Paws said...

THAT MEANS YOU

Cunt.

Paws said...

*insert mindless rum-fueled abuse here*

Billy the Bootlegger said...

'Wankeromics'? That's funny because it's true. What else am I supposed to do in Economics class? Take fucking notes? Hell no. Playing with my cock is much more productive.

My name is Billy the Bootlegger and I'm a wanker.

Paws said...

My name is Paws and I'm a wanker as well.

We can be wankers together.